“I don’t care what you say. I’m eating that bagel.”
Moments before a wreck at 4am in
“There’s a fish in my beer…and a little castle…what the fuck…”
Moments before getting hit with mace- “Listen. Listen. I know a guy who works here. We’ll be cool.”
“I do have a condom on.”
Moments before never being seen or heard from again- “Fuck you guys. I’m going home.”
Moments before getting fired- “Bosh…It’s Dars…I don’t flee good. I can’t be in tday.”
Moments before getting a DUI- “I’m cool guys. Look at me. I’m seriously. Look at me. I love you man.”
Moments before getting another DUI- “I’m cool guys. Look at me. I’m seriously. Look at me. I love you man.”
“It’s impossible to get arrested at a carnival.”
“Oh my god, you have Taquitos. We gotta make these.”
“Guys, come here! The Girls Gone Wild commercial is on! Aaawww yeeeaah.”
“What do you mean this isn’t my kitchen?”
“4s are for whores!”
“Coop is a cool guy, but I don’t think he treats you right. Come to my room, I want to show you something.”
“It’s not a twist-off stupid. Use a lighter.”
“I’m sleeping on your trampoline dude, turn the sprinklers off.”
1 comment:
“It’s not a twist-off stupid. Use a lighter.”
I can't count how many times I've said that. My lighter has dents. And I don't even know how to do that. Good times :)
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