Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Status Check

So operation "Lose 5 pounds by Christmas" has taken it's first casualty. The I was, minding my own business, when all of a sudden I was ambushed. They came quietly, and with extreme prejudice. The chocolate truffles of the holiday season. Son's of bitches infiltrated my defenses long enough to sneak three covert ops insurgents into my body. The plan now is to slowly defuse this ticking time bomb of chocolate cravings long enough to begin hating my body like I need to for this diet to work. I think it's funny that dietitians refer to a diet as "A lifestyle change". In no way is this going to be a lifestyle change after December 25th. After the 25th, the only change that is going to be made will be me installing elastic bands in my jeans like I'm going to be doing cross dressing stunt work on the set of Juno.

Anyways, I'm off to single handedly demoralize myself in front of the mirror before running too far, eating too little, and whining too much.

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