How to make a "Man Date"

My roommate Mike was apparently sharing lunch with Boredom and wrote me this email in an attempt to break the silence he was bathing in. I countered with the email below. Enjoy.


-----Original Message-----
From: Petersen, Michael
Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2008 3:16 PM
To: sales2@pacific.net
Subject: Golf (UNCLASSIFIED)

Classification: UNCLASSIFIED
Caveats: NONE

Mr. Smith -
Good afternoon. As a non-client and someone who doesn't care about your business, I'd like to cordially invite you to a golf outing tomorrow afternoon, promptly starting a 5:22 PM, PST. It will be held at Eagle Valley East and will involve the following:

1. Some form of golf
2. A cooler
3. Two 6-packs One 12 pack
4. A cigar or two
5. Numerous slapbets
6. An afterparty to be held at Carson Cigar Shop and/or Mo's

If you can attend, please feel free to contact me at any of the numbers below.


Very Respectfully,
Mike Petersen




See below for the response.



From: Sales2 [mailto:Sales2@pacific.net]
Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2008 3:32 PM
To: 'Petersen, Michael
Subject: RE: Golf (UNCLASSIFIED)

Peterson,
Your sincere and cordially articulated invitation has been received and entered into processing. Based on the current information stored in the "day planner database", I can comfortably say that I will be available at that date and time for the offered extra curricular activity. I am, unfortunately, more broke than a Korean bar maid who was recently ran train upon by the second string defense for the Bavarian Rugby Team. Therefore, I propose a compromise; Thursday, the day following the initial offering, we reschedule this outing with the applicable revisions and stipulations:

1. I get a +12 hole handicap
2. Bets are only permitted in beverage submission format
3. I drive the cart for at least 10 of the 18 holes
4. We are able to dress as incredibly inappropriately as conceivable
5. I can bring a camera

Agree to the terms and you my good sir...are on.

P.S. Please see my initialed acceptance of your terms. I had to make one minor adjustment.


1. Some form of golf DS
2. A cooler DS
3. Two 6-packs One 12 pack DS
4. A cigar or two DS
5. Numerous slapbets DS
6. An afterparty to be held at Carson Cigar Shop and/or Mo's DS


Slightly Respectfully,

Daris Smith
International Industrial Sales
Pacific Coast Flange Inc.